I Sit Next To The Devil's Fax Machine

I'm currently at work, but the office basically closes at 3pm thus I'm left to my own devices.


It has crossed my mind before that I may be sitting next to the Devil's fax machine (the last 3 numbers are 666) but I never truly believed it until today. It all started this morning when not a single fax could be sent or received through the heinous machine. In retaliation, the maintenance people were called to come fix it. Several hours later a woman arrived who was so beautiful that she froze every man in the office as she sauntered down the hallway. As she approached the fax machine I found I wasn't that surprised to see her wearing an all red outfit to match her blood red lips. When she reached the machine she simply grazed a button and every fax that had attempted to be sent and/or received came flying out of the machine, scattering like fallen doves all over the floor. The woman laughed viciously and walked her way out of the building. I sit next to the Devil's fax machine.

90% of that story was a lie.

Today I was thinking about lust. Lusting after inanimate objects. It happens to me quite frequently and I wonder why? These things show me no love in return, especially if they end up not fitting right or become a dog chew toy after one wear. But I can't resist. Currently I'm lusting strongly for a few things that I know I will not purchase or ever have the pleasure of owning these things because they are far too expensive. I'm in this new "never ever spend any money ever again" phase in order to some day be able to move out of my parents house (fat chance). So, I gaze longingly everyday at these items hoping that some day I will either stumble upon $1,000.00 or a box full of every treasure I've ever wanted (pipe dream).

I'm so madly in love with these Urban Outfitters boots. Probably because they are borderline hideous. Which makes them that much cooler.

This swimsuit is bananas.

I've contemplated the idea of spatz over the past few months. I've decided I'm a very strong supporter.

And just for good measure, Lust #4: A button machine! I'm totally into crafting and often willingly put forth far too much of my pay check towards craft supplies and I can't believe after all this time a button machine has never crossed my mind. I really really really want one. How much fun would it be to make custom buttons?? That is the only thing people would ever get from me for bdays, xmas, new years, half birthdays, anniversaries, etc. Ugh, my life would be so much cooler if I had a button machine.